The Diary of Sybil Ramkin
by Estelle Tiniwiel
Summary: The diary entries of an eleven year old Sybil Ramkin, about to leave home for the first time to go to school and concerned about just what might be in store.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Discworld, its places, or characters. They all belong to Terry Pratchett. I'm just borrowing them and make no money out of this.

Author's note: So far almost all of my Discworld fanfiction has been completely focused around Lord Havelock Vetinari, and although he is a fantastic character (and will be involved a fair bit even in this story), I reckoned it was time I did actually do something that wasn't all about him, so I chose another character whom I like: Sybil Ramkin. She's always seemed to me to be the kind of person who would keep a diary, and I've always wanted to know more about her life between the sixteen year-old seen in Night Watch and the older Sybil we all know and love, as the books don't provide a great deal of information, and, I suppose, about what she was like before. I have read some very good "Young Characters" stories within this fandom, and thought perhaps I'd give it a shot myself. As a result, I present you with the diaries of a young Sybil Ramkin. Hope you enjoy.

Estelle Tiniwiel –x-

**The diary of Sybil Ramkin.**

_**This diary belongs to Sybil Ramkin. No boys allowed, keep out!**_

**Entry 1.**

I start at my new school next week. I wish it wasn't so far away. I want it to be near Mummy and Daddy, in Ankh-Morpork, but Mummy says it's the best school for girls, so I have to go there, because I'm her best girl. I don't understand why she insists on saying that. It irritates me. I'm her only girl, it's not like she's got people to choose from.

I don't think Daddy's very happy about it. I saw him staring at me when he thought I was looking the other way and he looked upset, and when he's smiling and agreeing with Mummy and saying I have to go because it's the best place and everything his voice sounds a bit… tight. Havelock Vetinari started his big school three years ago and I don't think he likes it very much. He's at the Assassin's Guild, though, so I expect it's just that the work is very difficult. All Assassins have got to be clever, because the school is the best one in the world for boys and it teaches them how to be proper gentlemen, setting them apart from the middle-class people who pretend (I think I heard that girls are allowed there too now, but that's silly – whoever heard of girl Assassins?). Havelock will be fine, though, because he's very clever, way cleverer than me. I bet when he takes his exams he'll come at the top of all his classes. He's that kind of person, even if he denies it and says he's going to fail everything just to spite the ridiculous school system that pretends to turn young men into sophisticated and intelligent gentlemen, at home in any society, when really all it's breeding is a bunch of incompetent dullards who will one day end up ruling the country. He said that, though, not me. If Daddy heard me saying something like that he'd be really angry, because he went to that school and he's a wonderful person. I think Havelock just gets a bit bored sometimes because he's clever, that's why he's always making a nuisance of himself in classes and getting sent to the Headmaster. I think he gets teased about his name as well, although he's never mentioned it, but you hear things. I overheard Emilia Rust talking about someone the other day at Sarah Selachi's birthday party and she called them "Dog-botherer". Havelock's surname is the only name I can possibly think of that would have even the slightest relation with those kind of words. It's not a very nice name. I hope he's alright, but he's a very quiet boy and he doesn't talk to people much, so it's hard to tell. I think he talks to me more than most, though.

Oh no. I've just realised! The Assassins' Guild school is supposed to be the best school for boys and they all have to be clever, and the school I'm going to is supposed to be the best school for young ladies, so that means we all must have to be clever and intelligent and smart, but I'm none of those things at all! Oh, what am I going to do? I know, I could get Havelock to test me on things and then I won't look so stupid when I get there! But no, that won't work. I don't know what kind of things they'll expect us to know and anyway, Havelock's a boy, so he won't be learning the kind of things I'll be learning. Plus I wouldn't want to spoil his holidays by making him do a) more work, and b) spend time with a girl three years younger than him whom he probably thinks is a bit boring and will make him look silly if he's seen with her. I'll just have to try and make it on my own. I've learnt all the rules of etiquette from Mummy, or at least all the ones she says are "appropriate for a girl of your age", although I don't see why the rules should change at all. Why would anyone want to stop being so polite when they get older? I have a feeling (although I'm not sure, we don't talk about this sort of thing very much) that it's got something to do with getting married. I suppose that makes sense. The rules of politeness must change a bit when you get older and need to get married, because I'm polite to everyone all the time but no boys like me. Well, I mean, Havelock does, but not in that way. Ew, that'd be weird.

I'll have to stop writing now. The maid's just come in and told me it's time for lights out, so I'll have to do as she says or Daddy will get very angry. I used to make a little tent out of the bed sheets and a window pole and take a candle under there, but I had to stop that after the window pole slipped once and I set fire to the bed. Mummy was… what's that phrase Havelock uses... oh yes, _incandescent with rage_, because we were going to a friend's wedding the next day and my hair was singed. She said I looked ridiculous but personally I quite liked it. My hair was kind of frizzy, which is so much more interesting than straight and boring. The fire was really quite interesting, too. Anyway, I really must go now, because I can hear the maid coming back along the corridor to check up on me and make sure I've gone to sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Discworld, its places, or characters

Disclaimer: I don't own Discworld, its places, or characters. They all belong to Terry Pratchett. I'm just borrowing them and make no money out of this.

**Entry 2.**

It's my birthday today and I've had to spend the whole day packing ready to go to school in two days' time. Havelock came round to help me pack. I don't really know why he did that, I mean, it's not interesting, and he didn't really know where anything was, so he kept getting in my way. He said it was because I'm a girl so I won't be strong enough to lift and carry all the suitcases once they're full of clothes, but it's not like we haven't got servants. I think it's because he's going to miss me but doesn't want to admit it.

At first I thought that Havelock's birthday present for me was coming around and keeping me company whilst I packed and trying to help me, because it was very sweet and thoughtful of him, even if the packing bit wasn't all that successful, but I was wrong. Just before he was about to go home he slipped his hand into his pocket and brought out a lovely green velvet box. Inside it was square-cut diamond set into a silver chain with three emeralds either side of it! He said that if I was going to be going away from him to mingle with lots of other girls then he would at least make sure that I was the most beautiful one there! That made me feel so special and happy – it was the first of the presents I got today and it's absolutely gorgeous! Nobody has ever called me beautiful before either, except Mummy or Daddy, and everyone knows that parents don't count. I love it. I put it on to show him what it looked like and the diamonds and emeralds looked wonderful with the pale green dress I was wearing. Havelock made me swear never to take it off whilst I was at school. I don't say I blame him – it must have cost him an awful lot of money and it's so pretty that someone else is bound to want it. I wouldn't want it to go missing. I almost asked him how he had managed to get so much money to pay for it, but then I remembered that Havelock's family died when he was eleven and a half and his father had said he didn't trust anyone enough to put the Vetinari fortune into a trust fund, so Havelock got all the money straight-away and has the responsibility of running the estate, although I think he must get someone to help him with it. He doesn't usually spend much money on anything, so it was especially nice of him to get me such a lovely gift.

Havelock gave me a little kiss on the cheek before he left.

My parents got me a new travelling cloak and another evening dress as my present, which was nice of them. They will come in useful. I must admit that I was a bit disappointed, though, because I have lots of dresses already and I didn't really want them to give me something else to do with school. I smiled politely though and was grateful, and then Mummy started smiling and trying to hide it behind her hand, and Daddy had a funny look in his eye. He sat quietly for a bit and then jumped suddenly, as though someone had given him a shock. "Oh!" he said, "I'm sure there was something else! What was it now? Ah, yes, I remember, just let me go and fetch it," and then he left the room. I didn't know what was going on. Something else? But they'd already given me new clothes and they were really nice ones so I didn't see why they'd want to give me another one as well. Daddy came back into the room with something behind his back, but a corner was peeking out from behind his sleeve and I could see it was wrapped in sparkly green paper. He took it out from behind his back and handed it to me, smiling all the time. Mummy had given up trying to hide it by now and was smiling too. I unwrapped it carefully, not wanting to accidentally ruin what was inside, as it was obviously special if they were both smiling so much. I opened it. It was my stuffed dragon, Ernie! I'd had him so long and hugged him and played with him so much that his neck had gone all floppy, some of the embroidery that made up his scales had disintegrated, and one of his wings had half fallen off. I was really, really upset when Mummy took him away from me. She said that there were more important things than toys and that "It will be much cheaper to get a lovely new toy dragon than to get this mangy old one repaired, anyway." I thought she'd thrown him away! But there he was in front of me, new multicoloured scales embroidered on, his wing fixed, his neck restuffed, and the person who had fixed him had even replaced his flames with ones made of a shiny material that looked much more realistic than the old felt ones, which were a bit grey and grubby anyway. My parents must really love me.

I didn't have a birthday party. Because it's my last birthday before going away to school I wanted it to be just us.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Discworld, its places, or characters

Disclaimer: I don't own Discworld, its places, or characters. They all belong to Terry Pratchett. I'm just borrowing them and make no money out of this.

**Entry 3.**

I'm writing this in the coach on the way to school.

Cook came up to wake me today. That was odd, because it's usually Ethel the maid that comes and wakes me up, and I hardly saw her all day – when I did see her she smiled at me but refused to look at me for long. Cook stroked my forehead fondly and then pressed a big tin into my hands. She said, "I'm sorry that it's late, petal. It's a birthday present. I wanted you to have something nice from home to take away with you and I didn't want them to go stale. This way they'll stay fresh for a while", and she opened the tin and showed me a huge assortment of my favourite biscuits and cakes, with one especially huge cookie sat in the middle of it all with "Good luck, Sybil" on it in bright pink icing. I started to cry. I tried really hard not to, I know it's not done for a young noblewoman to cry, but I didn't want to go. I mean, it's supposed to be a really good school and I'm sure it will be interesting, I'll learn loads, but I'd rather stay here where I know people. I'd rather stay here with my friends.

Anyway, I'm all packed and on my way, with Mummy and Daddy in this coach with me and all my luggage following in the coach behind. I was rather upset this morning before we left, because Havelock said that he'd come and say goodbye to me before I went, but he didn't turn up. I waited and waited and made excuses to delay the journey and still he didn't come. I even tried pretending to have a heart-attack in the end, but all that happened was that Daddy hauled me up off the floor, gave me a slap on the back of my hand and told me to stop being silly and get in the coach. I called Havelock a bastard in my head, but not out loud. Girls aren't supposed to know language like that, but hang around a thirteen year old Assassin for any length of time and you'll pick things up, even if he goes pink when he realises.

It turns out, though, that I had been completely unfair when calling Havelock the B-word. We had just gone out of the city gates and the driver had just whipped the horses up into a trot, when there was the sound of sprinting footsteps outside and a thump on the side of the carriage. Suddenly Havelock was at the window, gripping the sill and bracing his feet against the bottom of the door. He was sweating and obviously out of breath, but the speed of the coach and the swift breeze that had picked up meant he had trouble regaining it. Mummy had raised her eyebrows and was now looking out of the other window, and Daddy was scowling whilst the corners of his mouth twitched. I'm not sure if he completely approves of Havelock.

"Sybil…" Havelock panted, after a minute or so of us staring at him whilst he tried to breathe, "I'm really… sorry… that I wasn't there at your house to say goodbye… It's all Downey's fault… he… asked me where I was going and… I didn't want to tell him, because… he doesn't like me very much and… I didn't want to get you involved… but he wasn't very happy with that so he tried to… um… extract the information via – _alternative methods_… and I only just managed to get away. I ran up to your house but you'd already gone, and the streets were really crowded and I couldn't run… so I went up on the roofs and took a more direct route and ran all the way here… I'm just glad that you'd only just started moving quickly… or I'd never have caught up with you." He started breathing very heavily again once he'd got the words out and rested his head against the side of the window frame.

"That's ok," I said, "you're here now. You didn't break your promise."

He grinned, with his eyes shut, and ran his tongue over his dry lips. "Oh. Good," he said. Then he took one hand off the sill, and, although he couldn't lean over and reach very well, he took my hand and shook it. For a moment I thought he was going to kiss it, which would have been really embarrassing in front of my parents. Perhaps that's what he thought, too.

"Good luck at school, Sybil. I'll write," he said. And with that he dropped off the coach and out of sight. I jumped up to the window and leaned out, shouting after the slim figure standing in the middle of the road and getting increasingly smaller, "Bye, Havelock! Bye!"

And then he was gone.

And when I get to school, I'll be all on my own.


End file.
